A year that is ending with much relaxation as our young tigers won some Cup and entitle the whole nation a day off on new year's eve. I have decided much earlier that I'll have a day off this day to be away, just away from the pushy reality I'm in. I needed a break so badly to shake off the tensed moments and juggled up thoughts.
And today as I flash upon the happenings in 2010....this fragile soul of mine is filled with awe and reverence on how Sovereign He is. Every part of it, He has so carefully planned, and painted the picture so beautifully for me. I still couldn't put in words how could the final two weeks went oops but deep inside of me, I know that His assuring words in Jeremiah never fails. For He knows the plans He have for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future.
Someone told me the other day that if we had known everything and have an answer to every 'why'.....we don't need the Almighty anymore. Simple profound truth. Mind boggling truth.
The chinese says a good starts marks half way to success...yet, the journey of faith is not about how we start....it's all about how we finish. I thank God today that this year end doesn't mark the end of my journey. I thank God today that I have a chance to come back to Him.
Father, I'm sorry, I've wronged You in my sinful ways, but I thank You that You forgive me, and love me as I am. Thank You.
I want to finish well, I pray.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
The ugly truth
Wonder why movie was named so....probably those type that A would love to watch :)
Not knowing what is it related, I ponder upon the word ugly....are all truths ugly? The most profound truth for mankind, still rejected unto this day, I could find no words to describe its significance in my life. But using the word beautiful to describe that truth? Ugly does sounds closer. No amount of description for ugliness represents the heart of the Romans at that very time, the hatred they spat, the mortal weakness they cherish.....A beautiful solution, an ugly truth.
I begin recalling that most of the time, truths are ugly, but it carries the most important element in it, it's none but the truth. When the true colors of mankind's nature first shown, A&E had to be chased out of Eden, it was ugly. The package of truth comes also with guilt, shame, pain, hurt and worst of all unforgiveness. Many years ago someone told me that forgiveness is a choice. A choice we could all make, crossing the thin fine line of punishing yourself and others into the freedom of facing the truth.
The ugly truth that is hammering me, and pinching my every bit to be awaken from the dream.....that dream? this dream? which dream? It's not important anymore.....Ouch~ I realized I am mere human, I too, know how pain is like, how hurt is like. Not saying ouch, doesnt mean I don't feel it, doesnt mean I'm immune to it. Interesting devotion I read this morning, Selwyn is writing about me. I am not to deny or to express the unpositive emotions, but acknowledge it. It's there, nothing can deny. It'l be there, even if I express. It'l be gone, when I acknowledge my meekness and let Him heal me.
Be calm, be brave, vivid words that cloud my mind. You are my strength, my hope, like no other.
Not knowing what is it related, I ponder upon the word ugly....are all truths ugly? The most profound truth for mankind, still rejected unto this day, I could find no words to describe its significance in my life. But using the word beautiful to describe that truth? Ugly does sounds closer. No amount of description for ugliness represents the heart of the Romans at that very time, the hatred they spat, the mortal weakness they cherish.....A beautiful solution, an ugly truth.
I begin recalling that most of the time, truths are ugly, but it carries the most important element in it, it's none but the truth. When the true colors of mankind's nature first shown, A&E had to be chased out of Eden, it was ugly. The package of truth comes also with guilt, shame, pain, hurt and worst of all unforgiveness. Many years ago someone told me that forgiveness is a choice. A choice we could all make, crossing the thin fine line of punishing yourself and others into the freedom of facing the truth.
The ugly truth that is hammering me, and pinching my every bit to be awaken from the dream.....that dream? this dream? which dream? It's not important anymore.....Ouch~ I realized I am mere human, I too, know how pain is like, how hurt is like. Not saying ouch, doesnt mean I don't feel it, doesnt mean I'm immune to it. Interesting devotion I read this morning, Selwyn is writing about me. I am not to deny or to express the unpositive emotions, but acknowledge it. It's there, nothing can deny. It'l be there, even if I express. It'l be gone, when I acknowledge my meekness and let Him heal me.
Be calm, be brave, vivid words that cloud my mind. You are my strength, my hope, like no other.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
our love, His love...
If you love something, set it free
If it comes back to you, it's yours
If it doesn't, it was never meant to be...
He loves me, sets me free
He waits for me to come back
He walks with me even when I wander away...
Only He, sees the depth of my heart and love me the same.
If it comes back to you, it's yours
If it doesn't, it was never meant to be...
He loves me, sets me free
He waits for me to come back
He walks with me even when I wander away...
Only He, sees the depth of my heart and love me the same.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Christmas. Blessed.
I wonder why everytime the familiar voice of Sheryl Crow and Sting never fail to soothe me a little. Somehow, the words that doesn't bring much meaning, but the tune that fills the heart is something i couldn't really explain....warm, and touching...
What a christmas, 2010. Things deep in the heart that only me and the Almighty will ever know, those that meant to be bottled and shared during my time alone, because I know that only in Him I will be loved just because I am me, fearfully and wonderfully made. Fairytales are made for princesses....like me ;)
Will be unwrapping the Christmas gift i got for myself....The Chronicles of Narnia...that's what Christmas is all about...unwrapping and discovering the One important gift of all!
This Christmas, I am blessed.
What a christmas, 2010. Things deep in the heart that only me and the Almighty will ever know, those that meant to be bottled and shared during my time alone, because I know that only in Him I will be loved just because I am me, fearfully and wonderfully made. Fairytales are made for princesses....like me ;)
Will be unwrapping the Christmas gift i got for myself....The Chronicles of Narnia...that's what Christmas is all about...unwrapping and discovering the One important gift of all!
This Christmas, I am blessed.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
December 2010
When familiar faces are no longer around, heart warming voices are miles apart, encouragement and concerns are only through a link between continents...these times, are the loneliest, quietest, longest.
A silent night where I remember those laughter and tensed moments that we shared. I miss you, friends who are everywhere in the world, who are in my connection in the borderless cyber world. I do, miss you.
Jingles and carols are reminding me of a joyous season, remembering the birth of Christ, sounding the whistle towards the end of the year's chapter. 5 goals, I remember, all 5 of them. I did 3. Praise God!
With an unknown road forward, I know I must plan for time to plan. Given wisdom and knowledge, it's too big a responsibility of wasting time, talent and treasure, that are assigned unto me. A new year coming ahead...exciting journey filled with uncertainties...His love endures forever. Never will He leave me, never will He forsake me.
A silent night where I remember those laughter and tensed moments that we shared. I miss you, friends who are everywhere in the world, who are in my connection in the borderless cyber world. I do, miss you.
Jingles and carols are reminding me of a joyous season, remembering the birth of Christ, sounding the whistle towards the end of the year's chapter. 5 goals, I remember, all 5 of them. I did 3. Praise God!
With an unknown road forward, I know I must plan for time to plan. Given wisdom and knowledge, it's too big a responsibility of wasting time, talent and treasure, that are assigned unto me. A new year coming ahead...exciting journey filled with uncertainties...His love endures forever. Never will He leave me, never will He forsake me.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Are you confirmed?
A simple shout - I'm confirmed, you'd be surprise on the comments I got...
Confirmation, is a good news to share. People rejoice over it because of the goodbyes to uncertainty and welcome the good gift of identity, which assures being a part of the family and to enjoy the privilege of becoming one. Well, at least that's how I feel when I got the letter in hand :)
While most people cherish the joy of being confirmed in their job and in marriage...how many out there cherish the confirmation of a place in paradise? It's not deemed to be an In-Thing nowadays to welcome the good gift of salvation, that is freely given to us. Because there's no good thing that doesn't require us to pay? Because it's not important, needless to say that it's a priority? Or because people are too ignorant to know that we are in need of One?
The joy of being confirmed as His heir, a far greater identity than any could hope for, a far bigger gift than any could ever imagine...it's yours for free, if you know and reach out your hand to receive.
I'm confirmed. Are you?
Confirmation, is a good news to share. People rejoice over it because of the goodbyes to uncertainty and welcome the good gift of identity, which assures being a part of the family and to enjoy the privilege of becoming one. Well, at least that's how I feel when I got the letter in hand :)
While most people cherish the joy of being confirmed in their job and in marriage...how many out there cherish the confirmation of a place in paradise? It's not deemed to be an In-Thing nowadays to welcome the good gift of salvation, that is freely given to us. Because there's no good thing that doesn't require us to pay? Because it's not important, needless to say that it's a priority? Or because people are too ignorant to know that we are in need of One?
The joy of being confirmed as His heir, a far greater identity than any could hope for, a far bigger gift than any could ever imagine...it's yours for free, if you know and reach out your hand to receive.
I'm confirmed. Are you?
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Veni. Vidi. Vici.
I come, I see, I conquer. Those were the exact words of Napoleon...
Months ago when I was seriously considering to take the step of faith for this trip, it really gave me goosebumps thinking about it. It still does.
Having to go through the journey to the summit via Mesilau trail, it was really a time of testing my patience. Why Mesilau? Well according to CS, Mesilau is for Heroes and Timpohon are for Sissys...and I got up that trail, as a hero. Sweet. The 10 hour climb up 8.5km was long and painful, especially at the beginning i already have difficulty breathing and it was really painful literally. All through the journey I have this walking stick with me, which reminds me of 'Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me'. Indeed, times where I really couldnt go on anymore, I recited Psalms 23 to keep me going.
And finally, up to Laban Rata, just in time for dinner before it closes. That night was a cold and stressful night as everyone is trying hard to sleep in for the 2am climb to the summit. I made it up despite having the guide advising me not to. I felt ok that morning but once I started a 10min climb, I felt that I started to regret. But I wanted to keep going so much. Weather was exceptionally good that day and I knew, I could make it further. Steps after steps gets harder especially passed 7.5km...where breathing really gets tougher for me.
Looking at Low's peak, I eventually made a stop at 8.4km, a mere 300m away from the peak. Watching most of them striving hard towards the peak, I stood, sat, lied down and took my rest to regain breath and energy that I much needed. The sky's already fully bright now though it was only a quarter past 6am. It was truly splendid up there, with the breathtaking views and scenic shots I managed to capture. I'm above the clouds! And once again, I'm marveled at His creation. So beautiful!
The journey downhill after breakfast from Laban Rata was...unexpected. It rained through the 5 hours and I was cold, feet soaked wet, hungry and alone. Worse still, I only had my bottle with me without any energy bar, and I was so hungry and strengthless. All I could do was keep going, faster and faster, to get something to eat when I got down to the Kinabalu park. To come to think of it, it was quite scary to have climbed down all by myself. But I was shown mercy, and experienced grace like never before.
Mt Kinabalu, 21-22 Aug 2010. My first encounter in the west tip of Borneo. I will be back.
Months ago when I was seriously considering to take the step of faith for this trip, it really gave me goosebumps thinking about it. It still does.
Having to go through the journey to the summit via Mesilau trail, it was really a time of testing my patience. Why Mesilau? Well according to CS, Mesilau is for Heroes and Timpohon are for Sissys...and I got up that trail, as a hero. Sweet. The 10 hour climb up 8.5km was long and painful, especially at the beginning i already have difficulty breathing and it was really painful literally. All through the journey I have this walking stick with me, which reminds me of 'Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me'. Indeed, times where I really couldnt go on anymore, I recited Psalms 23 to keep me going.
And finally, up to Laban Rata, just in time for dinner before it closes. That night was a cold and stressful night as everyone is trying hard to sleep in for the 2am climb to the summit. I made it up despite having the guide advising me not to. I felt ok that morning but once I started a 10min climb, I felt that I started to regret. But I wanted to keep going so much. Weather was exceptionally good that day and I knew, I could make it further. Steps after steps gets harder especially passed 7.5km...where breathing really gets tougher for me.
Looking at Low's peak, I eventually made a stop at 8.4km, a mere 300m away from the peak. Watching most of them striving hard towards the peak, I stood, sat, lied down and took my rest to regain breath and energy that I much needed. The sky's already fully bright now though it was only a quarter past 6am. It was truly splendid up there, with the breathtaking views and scenic shots I managed to capture. I'm above the clouds! And once again, I'm marveled at His creation. So beautiful!
The journey downhill after breakfast from Laban Rata was...unexpected. It rained through the 5 hours and I was cold, feet soaked wet, hungry and alone. Worse still, I only had my bottle with me without any energy bar, and I was so hungry and strengthless. All I could do was keep going, faster and faster, to get something to eat when I got down to the Kinabalu park. To come to think of it, it was quite scary to have climbed down all by myself. But I was shown mercy, and experienced grace like never before.
Mt Kinabalu, 21-22 Aug 2010. My first encounter in the west tip of Borneo. I will be back.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Still a child
Back to childhood
When time is longer
When mummy is younger
When doubts are greater
When dreams are further
When ideas are crazier
When roads are cleaner
When people are nicer
When friends are closer
When lifestyle is healthier
When hope is higher
When laughter is easier
When faith is simpler
Longing to go back in time
Where I will never be allowed to
Times when I can cry out loud for the simplest things
Not knowing that I can have the inability to do so one day
Yet when the world around is like a whirlwind
I am still welcomed
By the familiar Arms, wide opened
When time is longer
When mummy is younger
When doubts are greater
When dreams are further
When ideas are crazier
When roads are cleaner
When people are nicer
When friends are closer
When lifestyle is healthier
When hope is higher
When laughter is easier
When faith is simpler
Longing to go back in time
Where I will never be allowed to
Times when I can cry out loud for the simplest things
Not knowing that I can have the inability to do so one day
Yet when the world around is like a whirlwind
I am still welcomed
By the familiar Arms, wide opened
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
LOVE = R-I-S-K
爱真的需要勇气...the tune of Fish Leong's famous song was lingering in my mind as I got back from a short prayer time earlier...the phrase "what I need is courage" is hammering my thoughts so hard that I could feel it so strong...
Many times in our lives, we make choices to love. You choose to love the food you like, love the people who are dear to you, love the things you own, love the environment you're in...which is why I always believe that there's no such thing as 'I can't stop myself from loving...' As a matter of fact, it's a choice that we make, to love and not to love.
But what happens when you are called to love someone that you find so hard to love yet have no choice but to obey? Especially when you know you're vulnerable and prone to hurt, not just to yourself but possibly to others whom you love. [Selah]
I paused as I ended that sentence...someOne was called to love me, who are so imperfect and so hard to love, He knows He's vulnerable and compassion enough for me, and prone to be hurt by me, yet, He chose to obey. With that, I got my answer for tonight.
Love is many times spelt as R-I-S-K...I find so hard to take the step to continue loving, or loving more, I find myself drawing a boundary saying enough, I don't wanna know more...I don't have the courage to love, is because I don't want to take the risk. I'd rather keep in my comfort zone and do what I thought best. But someOne risked His life and took the costly way to redeem my life. And just as I was wondering how much would it cost me, I was told it's free. What if He turned around and decided at that very hour that I wasn't that worth for Him to love? Hopes dashed and burnt into ashes. But He took the risk. Loved me just as I am. And for the first time in my life, I too, took the risk to love someOne that I have never seen. By faith alone. If I can see everything that is happening ahead from me, that why do I need faith anyway?
What I got was grace. What I could give, is only grace.
Many times in our lives, we make choices to love. You choose to love the food you like, love the people who are dear to you, love the things you own, love the environment you're in...which is why I always believe that there's no such thing as 'I can't stop myself from loving...' As a matter of fact, it's a choice that we make, to love and not to love.
But what happens when you are called to love someone that you find so hard to love yet have no choice but to obey? Especially when you know you're vulnerable and prone to hurt, not just to yourself but possibly to others whom you love. [Selah]
I paused as I ended that sentence...someOne was called to love me, who are so imperfect and so hard to love, He knows He's vulnerable and compassion enough for me, and prone to be hurt by me, yet, He chose to obey. With that, I got my answer for tonight.
Love is many times spelt as R-I-S-K...I find so hard to take the step to continue loving, or loving more, I find myself drawing a boundary saying enough, I don't wanna know more...I don't have the courage to love, is because I don't want to take the risk. I'd rather keep in my comfort zone and do what I thought best. But someOne risked His life and took the costly way to redeem my life. And just as I was wondering how much would it cost me, I was told it's free. What if He turned around and decided at that very hour that I wasn't that worth for Him to love? Hopes dashed and burnt into ashes. But He took the risk. Loved me just as I am. And for the first time in my life, I too, took the risk to love someOne that I have never seen. By faith alone. If I can see everything that is happening ahead from me, that why do I need faith anyway?
What I got was grace. What I could give, is only grace.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Defining Beauty - Twins
Tiring day...i recalled last night when I had the pampering massage on my tired feet...wanna take the opportunity to introduce to you a friend who has passion in beauty and for girls to pamper and beautify themselves. Check out Twins Beauty Specialist @ Sunway Giza...The New Opening promotion is an unbelievable 50% off for everything on the menu!
Check out for yourself...and for the lovely nails i got last night, ain't they cute?
Check out for yourself...and for the lovely nails i got last night, ain't they cute?
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Game Over
Never a football fan, nor someone who understood football. I actually set time apart to watch 3 matches this FIFA WC 2010. Can you believe it? You better do :)
I must say that I really gained a lot of knowledge about football...now I can understand why people likes staring at a screen with 20 over guys running after a tiny ball in a gigantic field. Well, at least that's what I did too, and I enjoyed. It's more than passing the ball and scoring the goal, each technique the players used to control the ball, passing the ball, and even some foul movements that looks so unreasonable but the referee didnt whistle, has a purpose and skill behind. Though I may not know how to kick it, but I truly start to like watching.
The only 3 matches I watched was GER vs ENG, GER vs ARG & GER vs ESP. I didnt actually recall when did I start supporting the Nazis. All in all, I still think they put up with a good team fighting spirit this WC. Set aside my fav Klose, all others were equally good and instead of some big players in the event that has a couple of super kickers in the team, not to mention that ENG really is disappointing, GER has what we call a football TEAM. [Say what you like, this is what I think. Yes, as a first-timer!]
It was a tensed match between GER & ESP. The Spanish were bulls enough where the Germans were defensive and reserved. If Muller is on the field it could be another different story. Some say Paul the blur sotong is the one mastering this whole game, with a convincing 100% correct prediction towards the German's matches. I wonder how many people change their minds on betting based on the sotong's prediction...I prayed hard for the sotong to be wrong, coz it's saddening to see people 'worshipping' it rather than the Maker. But He has greater plans. The Germans had to lose so that no more predictions from the sotong for WC Final. Or else, how many more will be affected by gambling their life away, and worse still based on the trust in a sotong...goodness!
A young and agressive squad, with a strong goalie, good attacking & defending skills, I really hope they will make it back in the next WC. Till then, let's see how the Spanish bulls kick out the potatoes~
I must say that I really gained a lot of knowledge about football...now I can understand why people likes staring at a screen with 20 over guys running after a tiny ball in a gigantic field. Well, at least that's what I did too, and I enjoyed. It's more than passing the ball and scoring the goal, each technique the players used to control the ball, passing the ball, and even some foul movements that looks so unreasonable but the referee didnt whistle, has a purpose and skill behind. Though I may not know how to kick it, but I truly start to like watching.
The only 3 matches I watched was GER vs ENG, GER vs ARG & GER vs ESP. I didnt actually recall when did I start supporting the Nazis. All in all, I still think they put up with a good team fighting spirit this WC. Set aside my fav Klose, all others were equally good and instead of some big players in the event that has a couple of super kickers in the team, not to mention that ENG really is disappointing, GER has what we call a football TEAM. [Say what you like, this is what I think. Yes, as a first-timer!]
It was a tensed match between GER & ESP. The Spanish were bulls enough where the Germans were defensive and reserved. If Muller is on the field it could be another different story. Some say Paul the blur sotong is the one mastering this whole game, with a convincing 100% correct prediction towards the German's matches. I wonder how many people change their minds on betting based on the sotong's prediction...I prayed hard for the sotong to be wrong, coz it's saddening to see people 'worshipping' it rather than the Maker. But He has greater plans. The Germans had to lose so that no more predictions from the sotong for WC Final. Or else, how many more will be affected by gambling their life away, and worse still based on the trust in a sotong...goodness!
A young and agressive squad, with a strong goalie, good attacking & defending skills, I really hope they will make it back in the next WC. Till then, let's see how the Spanish bulls kick out the potatoes~
Thursday, June 24, 2010
A new beginning...
Thinking about the 2 weeks, I closed my eyes and said a little prayer in my heart. Thank You. Are the words that filled me. I'm happy. And I can't help to have a smile.
The night before was a late one for me, is this us? the ones whom You have chosen to die for? Is this how You expect us to be? I woke up with a psalm of praise assuring that He is eternal, unchangeable, infinite, no matter who we are, what we do and how we behave.
In awe of His great plan, I am truly grateful for what God has done for me. Given His life for me, and still commit to never leave nor forsake me.
The 2 weeks that has passed, I'm in this new place, beginning another chapter of my life. Moments of fear or reluctance are no more. I am at peace, and know deep in my heart that He is, again, carefully planning every single part of my life. Crossing through another hurdle in my life, which togetherly struck me last year, I came out stronger, tougher, and more determined knowing that if He is with me, who can be against me? I'm thankful for His favor, blessing me with friends in this place that are helpful, opening a harvest field for me to continue His work through my life. The messages of Cultural Mandate are seemingly convincing, and it begins a new push in me. I know, I am here, as a visible being for them to connect those who cannot see the eternal parakletos.
Thank God for His grace.
Thank God for friends that walked with me.
Thank God for opened doors.
Thank God, for when I don't understand, and when I can't see His hand, I can trust His heart.
I'm happy, really happy, today.
The night before was a late one for me, is this us? the ones whom You have chosen to die for? Is this how You expect us to be? I woke up with a psalm of praise assuring that He is eternal, unchangeable, infinite, no matter who we are, what we do and how we behave.
In awe of His great plan, I am truly grateful for what God has done for me. Given His life for me, and still commit to never leave nor forsake me.
The 2 weeks that has passed, I'm in this new place, beginning another chapter of my life. Moments of fear or reluctance are no more. I am at peace, and know deep in my heart that He is, again, carefully planning every single part of my life. Crossing through another hurdle in my life, which togetherly struck me last year, I came out stronger, tougher, and more determined knowing that if He is with me, who can be against me? I'm thankful for His favor, blessing me with friends in this place that are helpful, opening a harvest field for me to continue His work through my life. The messages of Cultural Mandate are seemingly convincing, and it begins a new push in me. I know, I am here, as a visible being for them to connect those who cannot see the eternal parakletos.
Thank God for His grace.
Thank God for friends that walked with me.
Thank God for opened doors.
Thank God, for when I don't understand, and when I can't see His hand, I can trust His heart.
I'm happy, really happy, today.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
你給了我，卻又把它帶走
A tragedy much regretted, a news much feared.
Will I have the same faith to hold on to Him? Quietly in my heart I pray that I do. Always, blessed be Your name.
Will I have the same faith to hold on to Him? Quietly in my heart I pray that I do. Always, blessed be Your name.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
road breakfast...
Troubled, I tried recalling my feelings of the experience on the road this morning...
Never a fan of cat, ask any friend of mine. But I had so much compassion for this little kitten, I saw it running to search for shelter (which sadly, they thought a dark spot, i.e under the wheel is a good spot...) Coming out from underneath the gold Myvi (which earlier the aunty gave me a evilish look when I was on a correct lane but her car just couldnt get pass), the kitten was running opposite traffic...and as I saw it reaching at the wheel of the red Kancil...I wanted to honk...I shouted in my car...I was panic...and with the slow traffic moving, myself at <10kmh to be exact...the little body was rolled over, twice, by a gigantic Kancil in it's terms...tried to struggle and move after the first, and no sign of life after the second.
I shouted. I wanted it to hear and run away. But it's now lifeless.
Too bad, this happened on the lane on my right. And obviously when I was too carried away...bang! Notice it's a small letter bang as it's just a minor hit...I got down the car, a small scratch on the Waja in front of me, the uncle asked why didn't I brake, I said I panicked when I saw the kitten hit by the car. The uncle saw. Some motorcyclist even stopped and lift up the small lifeless body and place on the grass nearby. The uncle said it's ok, no worries and no need to compensate. Thank God!
Got back into my car. Continue my driving. And unknowingly streams of tears just rolled out...I was never a fan of cats. Yet, I feel so sad for a life that has no soul, that does not have understanding on the purpose of being created and living. They are lives who, too, grasp for shelter, need tender care and, many times...fragile. The song 'Angel' by Mayday is playing...and the chorus just fits to voice out my desperation in need of reliance and strength. He's the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end.
像孩子依赖着肩膀
像眼泪依赖着脸庞
你就像天使一样给我依赖给我力量
像诗人依赖着月亮
像海豚依赖海洋
你是天使你是天使
你是我最初和最后的天堂
I thank God my fragile life is held in His hands.
Never a fan of cat, ask any friend of mine. But I had so much compassion for this little kitten, I saw it running to search for shelter (which sadly, they thought a dark spot, i.e under the wheel is a good spot...) Coming out from underneath the gold Myvi (which earlier the aunty gave me a evilish look when I was on a correct lane but her car just couldnt get pass), the kitten was running opposite traffic...and as I saw it reaching at the wheel of the red Kancil...I wanted to honk...I shouted in my car...I was panic...and with the slow traffic moving, myself at <10kmh to be exact...the little body was rolled over, twice, by a gigantic Kancil in it's terms...tried to struggle and move after the first, and no sign of life after the second.
I shouted. I wanted it to hear and run away. But it's now lifeless.
Too bad, this happened on the lane on my right. And obviously when I was too carried away...bang! Notice it's a small letter bang as it's just a minor hit...I got down the car, a small scratch on the Waja in front of me, the uncle asked why didn't I brake, I said I panicked when I saw the kitten hit by the car. The uncle saw. Some motorcyclist even stopped and lift up the small lifeless body and place on the grass nearby. The uncle said it's ok, no worries and no need to compensate. Thank God!
Got back into my car. Continue my driving. And unknowingly streams of tears just rolled out...I was never a fan of cats. Yet, I feel so sad for a life that has no soul, that does not have understanding on the purpose of being created and living. They are lives who, too, grasp for shelter, need tender care and, many times...fragile. The song 'Angel' by Mayday is playing...and the chorus just fits to voice out my desperation in need of reliance and strength. He's the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end.
像孩子依赖着肩膀
像眼泪依赖着脸庞
你就像天使一样给我依赖给我力量
像诗人依赖着月亮
像海豚依赖海洋
你是天使你是天使
你是我最初和最后的天堂
I thank God my fragile life is held in His hands.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
A life, no more
There is a time for everything, Time to rejoice and time to mourn...Times that are easy and times that are the toughest to face...who can comprehend the marvelous creation of God and the joy that's from it? The arrival of a newborn in the hands of their proud parents...just like knowing the arrival of baby Lynn, baby Haley, baby Sophia, baby Chloe, baby YeeMun, baby Deron...I wished someday I'll hold my very own in my arms. I imagine a long corridor filled with pink and yellow decorations, warm and as you stroll down this lane, you see babies in their cradle...stretching themselves for activity, quieting themselves in a still sleep...
What about those forgotten ones? Those who secretly hoped so much that they will experience the joy of being parents? Those who have done all they could to have a joy of their own, to protect their little one...yet, surrender at the reality of science & doctors. We, mere human...He, give and take away...I couldnt forget that day when i saw the deep sorrowful face of the father, I knew, somehow, something wasn't right...and I can tell..it's with the baby. It is, and after today, it was. I couldn't bear the thought that the little life, so fragile and so wanting to live on, is going to be no more. I simply couldn't hold back my tears thinking of this. No eye will see, No ear will hear...but I know deep down, this is a creation of God. How can I possibly tell them to trust in God when the doctors say it's better to let go? How could I bear to see another tear from the mother's eyes when I know these words will only pierce her heart more? I couldn't.
- fiat justitia et pereat mundus -
I simply couldn't do that, this time. I'm sorry...I knew it hurt You more, for a life you created, are now no more...A choice made, a day which the lovely corridor is greyish and cold...A life, no more...
:'(
What about those forgotten ones? Those who secretly hoped so much that they will experience the joy of being parents? Those who have done all they could to have a joy of their own, to protect their little one...yet, surrender at the reality of science & doctors. We, mere human...He, give and take away...I couldnt forget that day when i saw the deep sorrowful face of the father, I knew, somehow, something wasn't right...and I can tell..it's with the baby. It is, and after today, it was. I couldn't bear the thought that the little life, so fragile and so wanting to live on, is going to be no more. I simply couldn't hold back my tears thinking of this. No eye will see, No ear will hear...but I know deep down, this is a creation of God. How can I possibly tell them to trust in God when the doctors say it's better to let go? How could I bear to see another tear from the mother's eyes when I know these words will only pierce her heart more? I couldn't.
- fiat justitia et pereat mundus -
I simply couldn't do that, this time. I'm sorry...I knew it hurt You more, for a life you created, are now no more...A choice made, a day which the lovely corridor is greyish and cold...A life, no more...
:'(
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Serenity Prayer
How many times have we come accross situations where we couldn't change? Face trials where we couldn't do a thing?
At these times, our talents, skills, strengths, abilities all seem to burst into air, and turn into ashes...
At these times, prayer, is the only thing that matters, that will move mountains, that is above all ability, that is able to give us peace.
I can't help to startle at the amplitude of stress from surroundings that overwhelms my soul...I couldn't take a step further without quieting down and run back to Him for energy...yet His word says, 'Take heart, I have overcome it all...' This is He, the Mighty One, the I AM.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference...
At these times, our talents, skills, strengths, abilities all seem to burst into air, and turn into ashes...
At these times, prayer, is the only thing that matters, that will move mountains, that is above all ability, that is able to give us peace.
I can't help to startle at the amplitude of stress from surroundings that overwhelms my soul...I couldn't take a step further without quieting down and run back to Him for energy...yet His word says, 'Take heart, I have overcome it all...' This is He, the Mighty One, the I AM.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference...
Thursday, April 15, 2010
A Climate Change...
I once heard this saying, If you love something, set it free, if it comes back to you, it is yours. If it does not, it was never meant to be.
Parting, is one of the most difficult thing in life that I have to learn to deal with. Sometimes it just cost us so much of emotional drain, just to let go of someone or even merely something that is dear to us. When we first started GEPC, we are carrying a vision that this will be a church to disciple young people, build up leaders, discover and expand potentials, and send out people that will walk forth the path with the gospel of peace. And until today, this vision has never fail to encourage us to keep going, to answer the call that God has for our lives.
Trust me, it was never easy to have people that is so dear leaving you one by one, year by year…But having to see young people answering callings in lives and going forth to proclaim His good news in places they will be placed, never fail to give me the blessed assurance that His word is ever true as written in Jeremiah 29:11. Through these years God has helped me to learn the art of ‘parting’ and learn to be stronger. So everyone is leaving, ‘what about me?’ was a question I asked years ago. ‘where would I go?’ is another one…and ‘what is my calling and mission field?’ still keep ringing in my mind…
A pastor whom I truly respect told me this, ‘we have to learn to have a burden for people around us…no matter where we are placed’…this simply message touched my heart so much that I have thought over it for weeks. Yes…indeed at this point of time in my life, this is where God has placed me and THIS is my mission field. He has called me to serve and disciple and THIS is where I will build His church and the gates of hades shall not prevail against it! So does it matter too much where we wanna go so badly? Or matter so much when our brother or sister have to leave to somewhere else where God has placed him/her there?
Emotionally…I think I will still say yes, no doubt I’m still human. But the peace of mind given by Him that surpasses all understanding has taught me to learn the word SOVEREIGN. He plans best and never makes mistakes. So if you are reading this and you’re the one going to be sent out as ‘lambs among the wolves’ to where He has destined you to be, Fear Not, my brother & sister. We have a Hope that is ever sure.
In the next few months we will be going through a time of testing. More than half of the campus leaders will be called to the next phase of their lives. It will be a testing stage for those leaving as well as those remaining.
Some already asked, what will happen next? Well, I can assure you there’s no magic that anyone can do but our prayers and faith in God is definitely gonna turn the situation the way He purposed it! Phil Pringle once preached, a church grows in the climate of war…when we are weak we shall be made strong!
Into Your hands Lord, we entrust GEPC to you. Bring us through this climate of war!
Parting, is one of the most difficult thing in life that I have to learn to deal with. Sometimes it just cost us so much of emotional drain, just to let go of someone or even merely something that is dear to us. When we first started GEPC, we are carrying a vision that this will be a church to disciple young people, build up leaders, discover and expand potentials, and send out people that will walk forth the path with the gospel of peace. And until today, this vision has never fail to encourage us to keep going, to answer the call that God has for our lives.
Trust me, it was never easy to have people that is so dear leaving you one by one, year by year…But having to see young people answering callings in lives and going forth to proclaim His good news in places they will be placed, never fail to give me the blessed assurance that His word is ever true as written in Jeremiah 29:11. Through these years God has helped me to learn the art of ‘parting’ and learn to be stronger. So everyone is leaving, ‘what about me?’ was a question I asked years ago. ‘where would I go?’ is another one…and ‘what is my calling and mission field?’ still keep ringing in my mind…
A pastor whom I truly respect told me this, ‘we have to learn to have a burden for people around us…no matter where we are placed’…this simply message touched my heart so much that I have thought over it for weeks. Yes…indeed at this point of time in my life, this is where God has placed me and THIS is my mission field. He has called me to serve and disciple and THIS is where I will build His church and the gates of hades shall not prevail against it! So does it matter too much where we wanna go so badly? Or matter so much when our brother or sister have to leave to somewhere else where God has placed him/her there?
Emotionally…I think I will still say yes, no doubt I’m still human. But the peace of mind given by Him that surpasses all understanding has taught me to learn the word SOVEREIGN. He plans best and never makes mistakes. So if you are reading this and you’re the one going to be sent out as ‘lambs among the wolves’ to where He has destined you to be, Fear Not, my brother & sister. We have a Hope that is ever sure.
In the next few months we will be going through a time of testing. More than half of the campus leaders will be called to the next phase of their lives. It will be a testing stage for those leaving as well as those remaining.
Some already asked, what will happen next? Well, I can assure you there’s no magic that anyone can do but our prayers and faith in God is definitely gonna turn the situation the way He purposed it! Phil Pringle once preached, a church grows in the climate of war…when we are weak we shall be made strong!
Into Your hands Lord, we entrust GEPC to you. Bring us through this climate of war!
Monday, March 22, 2010
Here's my eventful weekend!
Such an eventful weekend~
Weekends, usually fully packed for me, is the same this week. However, amidst busy-ness i really thank God for being able to spend quality time with people and still find strength to go on and on!
To start on, Saturday morning was greeted with an early rise and morning swim. I then joined J&Y to Subang to meet up with our auditor on some accounting matters and next we headed to a K-luunch. Sing sing sing like how Chris Tomlin put it...we had a great time together with Jas, Lee & WanZi. Next we head to church, running here and there settling down for errands but still, I manage to catch a bowl of yummy cendol :) It was a wonderful service with His presence all throughout the praise & word. Many were ministered to and I took the chance to bless some of my sisters with prayers I longed to. By the time we head for dinner it's already 9...but it was a relax one as we watched the recent CNY movie of the 72 tenants...
I was home safely after a couple of jokes from Jimmy on the 'bert' and some funny names that followed. Tired, I did laundry, some cleaning up, and head for an episode of drama while waiting for laundry...well thank God the dvd couldnt be played after a while or else I would've spent longer time there. Frustrated after trying for so long, I went back to my room for some uZapping and a chapter on Selwyn Hughes' book. I can't pretty understand ZiHui & Lee out there watching a movie without sound...so I greeted them goodnight before turning in...there goes, my Saturday. And oh, before my eyes closed, I played that song which always puts me to bed :)
The sleep seems to be too tiring as I was having terrible dreams which in my heart I truly pray that they won't be real.
Sunday morning, I was up before my alarm at 8 rang...grrrr...there came a growling in my tummy, can you believe it? Guess I should know where does my additional pounds come from...Roll and roll until slightly before 9, I decided to wake up and go to church early, just to catch anyone's that's around for breakfast. Had a satisfying pau and enjoyed the most happening event in GEPC....Sunday prayer! For real, ask any of my youths and they will tell you the same :) As we finished prayer and preparing for lunch, the Guitar & Drama performance team separated for practice for coming Easter. Well, lunch wasn't really worth mentioning, but of course as a responsible consumer, please do consider twice if you are considering the i-shabu place above Gading. Trust me, think twice. Can you believe that after an unsatisfying lunch which we particularly cancelled half of our orders, we headed to Gading for a real piece of food! Yum!
After lunch was house viewing with J,Y & Sean. Can't believe with that price and location, still it was sold out so fast! Without making any purchase, we went to Taipei Walker for some drinks. Thumbs up for the sour plum green tea. Yum! Others were so so only with that price paid. I assure you that Uncle Bob serves better ShiLin chicken...I was waiting for a call to climb the FRIM hill but I guess it was called off due to the weather. J suggested we go swimming instead. And there, within the next hour we were gathering and picking up Jane, Lean, Hui, KC and go back to my place for a short 'rest' and feasting session since it was drizzling. Thanks KC for the yummy dessert :)
Weather got better with milder drizzle and so off we went to the pool! You gotta see for your own eyes the 2 funny girls carrying a huge umbrella sitting by the pool while watching the rest of us swim. We had a great time there, for about an hour and headed up for a shower before dinner. And the word Dinner......is what worth mentioning. Let the pics speaks for themselves...
Weekends, usually fully packed for me, is the same this week. However, amidst busy-ness i really thank God for being able to spend quality time with people and still find strength to go on and on!
To start on, Saturday morning was greeted with an early rise and morning swim. I then joined J&Y to Subang to meet up with our auditor on some accounting matters and next we headed to a K-luunch. Sing sing sing like how Chris Tomlin put it...we had a great time together with Jas, Lee & WanZi. Next we head to church, running here and there settling down for errands but still, I manage to catch a bowl of yummy cendol :) It was a wonderful service with His presence all throughout the praise & word. Many were ministered to and I took the chance to bless some of my sisters with prayers I longed to. By the time we head for dinner it's already 9...but it was a relax one as we watched the recent CNY movie of the 72 tenants...
I was home safely after a couple of jokes from Jimmy on the 'bert' and some funny names that followed. Tired, I did laundry, some cleaning up, and head for an episode of drama while waiting for laundry...well thank God the dvd couldnt be played after a while or else I would've spent longer time there. Frustrated after trying for so long, I went back to my room for some uZapping and a chapter on Selwyn Hughes' book. I can't pretty understand ZiHui & Lee out there watching a movie without sound...so I greeted them goodnight before turning in...there goes, my Saturday. And oh, before my eyes closed, I played that song which always puts me to bed :)
The sleep seems to be too tiring as I was having terrible dreams which in my heart I truly pray that they won't be real.
Sunday morning, I was up before my alarm at 8 rang...grrrr...there came a growling in my tummy, can you believe it? Guess I should know where does my additional pounds come from...Roll and roll until slightly before 9, I decided to wake up and go to church early, just to catch anyone's that's around for breakfast. Had a satisfying pau and enjoyed the most happening event in GEPC....Sunday prayer! For real, ask any of my youths and they will tell you the same :) As we finished prayer and preparing for lunch, the Guitar & Drama performance team separated for practice for coming Easter. Well, lunch wasn't really worth mentioning, but of course as a responsible consumer, please do consider twice if you are considering the i-shabu place above Gading. Trust me, think twice. Can you believe that after an unsatisfying lunch which we particularly cancelled half of our orders, we headed to Gading for a real piece of food! Yum!
After lunch was house viewing with J,Y & Sean. Can't believe with that price and location, still it was sold out so fast! Without making any purchase, we went to Taipei Walker for some drinks. Thumbs up for the sour plum green tea. Yum! Others were so so only with that price paid. I assure you that Uncle Bob serves better ShiLin chicken...I was waiting for a call to climb the FRIM hill but I guess it was called off due to the weather. J suggested we go swimming instead. And there, within the next hour we were gathering and picking up Jane, Lean, Hui, KC and go back to my place for a short 'rest' and feasting session since it was drizzling. Thanks KC for the yummy dessert :)
Weather got better with milder drizzle and so off we went to the pool! You gotta see for your own eyes the 2 funny girls carrying a huge umbrella sitting by the pool while watching the rest of us swim. We had a great time there, for about an hour and headed up for a shower before dinner. And the word Dinner......is what worth mentioning. Let the pics speaks for themselves...
I remember the yellow bowls and cutleries which looks like prisoner's. But the food, was really good I tell ya...now that I've found this again, next round I've to bring mum here...Such a nice hot bowl of soup on a rainy Sunday nite after a swim. Now, how does that sound? :)
The night's complimented with a constant drizzle and rain...so nice to sleep, too nice for me not to wake up this morning and late for class! And yeah, I went Body Pump for the first time this morning. I feel dumb as usual...but instructor said he thought I did weights before. Well probably that's just some motivational words for me to keep coming. Haha!
Coming up this week, none other than CG outing! Tentatively I'm already joining 3 CGs on Thurs, Fri & Sun...Woohoo~
Friday, March 5, 2010
有意
Was catching up on the drama of Burning Flame III...those familiar characters remind me of old times when the drama first showed...the spirit of never giving up (though its just a drama) never fails to draw tears and inspire me. And yes I still know, it's just a drama :)
Want to share on this closing song...the introduction was very familiar at once...then I realize it's another different song all over... Enjoy :)
Want to share on this closing song...the introduction was very familiar at once...then I realize it's another different song all over... Enjoy :)
Monday, March 1, 2010
Marching into March...
Didn't realize that I have not been blogging for almost a month, well not exactly as Feb is quite a short month. CNY is officially over last night...The eat, drink and be merry sessions were heart warming and something I really look forward to every year. This year however, is extremely hot at my sweet little hometown of Ipoh...it's just superrrrrrrrrrr hot and un-tahan-able...without air-cond and frequent showers it's hard to even stay still at home...thank God for the inventors of air conditioners.
The last weekend of the CNY was celebrated well in a little town called Seremban. A group of us were there for Leaders Retreat at STM, a local Theological Seminary. I'm thankful for the sessions that well blessed my heart and recharged my spirit, as well as bonding sessions of games which really sweat us all out! Too bad we didnt get to have the famous bbq crab or else the trip would be flawless...well, looking forward to the next one :)
Marching into March, it'll be busy months ahead...as usual...and i'm already lining up my schedule for the coming months. Weddings, Easter, Conferences, Trips...etc etc...For sure one of the items in the SMART list will be conquering that mountain...am really looking forward to it!
The last weekend of the CNY was celebrated well in a little town called Seremban. A group of us were there for Leaders Retreat at STM, a local Theological Seminary. I'm thankful for the sessions that well blessed my heart and recharged my spirit, as well as bonding sessions of games which really sweat us all out! Too bad we didnt get to have the famous bbq crab or else the trip would be flawless...well, looking forward to the next one :)
Marching into March, it'll be busy months ahead...as usual...and i'm already lining up my schedule for the coming months. Weddings, Easter, Conferences, Trips...etc etc...For sure one of the items in the SMART list will be conquering that mountain...am really looking forward to it!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Defining church
To some people, the church is a building.
To some people, the church is only for nerds and boring people.
To some people, the church is an unimportant weekly routine subject to adjustments.
To some people, the church is a choice of entertainment when we have nothing better to do.
To some people, the church is a place to runaway from our problems.
To some people, the church is where we can take advantage of people who are friendly to us.
To some people, the church is a place to make me feel better after I've done wrong.
To some people, the church is according to my standards and likeness and if I don't like it, I'll walk away.
But...
According to Him, His church is righteous and holy.
According to Him, His church is faithful and true.
According to Him, His church is a tower of refuge.
According to Him, His church is a place for hearts to heal, for Christ to be revealed.
According to Him, His church is a light of the city.
According to Him, His church strengthens the weak.
According to Him, His church is strong and mighty.
According to Him, His church is just as He is.
"I will build My church and the gates of hades shall not prevail against it." Matt 16:18b
We are the church, we are His church. His church, is according to His definitions.
To some people, the church is only for nerds and boring people.
To some people, the church is an unimportant weekly routine subject to adjustments.
To some people, the church is a choice of entertainment when we have nothing better to do.
To some people, the church is a place to runaway from our problems.
To some people, the church is where we can take advantage of people who are friendly to us.
To some people, the church is a place to make me feel better after I've done wrong.
To some people, the church is according to my standards and likeness and if I don't like it, I'll walk away.
But...
According to Him, His church is righteous and holy.
According to Him, His church is faithful and true.
According to Him, His church is a tower of refuge.
According to Him, His church is a place for hearts to heal, for Christ to be revealed.
According to Him, His church is a light of the city.
According to Him, His church strengthens the weak.
According to Him, His church is strong and mighty.
According to Him, His church is just as He is.
"I will build My church and the gates of hades shall not prevail against it." Matt 16:18b
We are the church, we are His church. His church, is according to His definitions.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Tiger Woohoo~
I had, by chance, got to hear of the very odd name of this show...everyone in town is talking about it...and so I heard, an all-Malaysian movie, produced locally...the only reason that prompted me to watch is that to support the filming industry of Malaysia by purchasing a ticket for this. Well, I wanted too, to see how good the production will be...so off we went, 5 of us to MV for this movie.
Well, I must say that I have laughed every bit of the joke, cried at a couple of scenes where it really touched my heart, and felt so at home watching this very movie. Thumbs up to the production team. And I'm proud, for the first time, watching a movie like this, by our very own fellow Malaysians...
I didnt know what story it is about, and didnt bother to watch the synopsis...anyway as I rarely spend on watching Chinese movies in cinema...i figured that there would always be laughter and since it's a CNY movie, it should be quite relaxing. I was impressed by the theme song...before going for the show. So I was anticipating a good one. And I mean good.
Well, I must say that I have laughed every bit of the joke, cried at a couple of scenes where it really touched my heart, and felt so at home watching this very movie. Thumbs up to the production team. And I'm proud, for the first time, watching a movie like this, by our very own fellow Malaysians...Tiger Woohoo!~
Friday, January 22, 2010
Determined!
Ever since the unusual souvenir I got from Sibu Island, I decided not to slow down and keep the pace going. Be it staying healthy, building stamina, keeping shape or giving myself another reason to eat more...I'm working on keeping the schedule, just starting from 15mins at the park on Wed, and 30mins this morning at the gym.
It's such a nice way to kick start my lovely Friday morning. Though I had swollen eyes due to only-I-know-why, I woke up before 7 and got my feet going when the sky's still dim. The sweat's great and I love the after - a warm shower and hair wash...simply comforting for a nice day ahead.
Keep it going! I'm determined to make this regular :)
It's such a nice way to kick start my lovely Friday morning. Though I had swollen eyes due to only-I-know-why, I woke up before 7 and got my feet going when the sky's still dim. The sweat's great and I love the after - a warm shower and hair wash...simply comforting for a nice day ahead.
Keep it going! I'm determined to make this regular :)
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
A wish came true...
I've wanted to get away to an island or at least a beach...amidst all the hectic days going on since towards the end of last year...with the Pangkor Island plans going silent to nowhere...I thought this will not happen until who-knows-when...but God has been good and He made my wish came true! Well...in another way but still...it was a great weekend off at Sibu Island!
On 15th Jan 4.30am we reached the lobby of PS. The familiar GJ is still unopened on a relaxing friday morning...roads are nice to travel as i reached in less than 8 mins from home! There we started our journey, 3 hours on PLUS and 3 hours on the winding trunk road. I was soundly asleep after a while reading as the nite earlier i hardly slept. Winding roads are no threat to me. And there we were, at the jetty of Tanjung Leman via Kulai. Finally i caught a glimpse of water & huge wind...we cant even take a photo correctly without holding my hair...but the feeling of the wind hitting my face was simply great...
Coming up next was what I call unexpected. The boat ride heading Sibu Island, the 30 mins was challenging. It was roller coaster all the way as the sea was very choppy. January is the worst Monsoon season they have here and trust me, my pal googled on how to avoid motion sickness before she got on board...many people felt uneasy and wanted to puke...for me...It's just the usual roller coaster feeling that I don't like...the one where you feel your heart drop. Mine dropped numerous times in the boat carrying 50 over of us. But as soon as all these 'storm' were over...what's in front made me forgot all of it...
On 15th Jan 4.30am we reached the lobby of PS. The familiar GJ is still unopened on a relaxing friday morning...roads are nice to travel as i reached in less than 8 mins from home! There we started our journey, 3 hours on PLUS and 3 hours on the winding trunk road. I was soundly asleep after a while reading as the nite earlier i hardly slept. Winding roads are no threat to me. And there we were, at the jetty of Tanjung Leman via Kulai. Finally i caught a glimpse of water & huge wind...we cant even take a photo correctly without holding my hair...but the feeling of the wind hitting my face was simply great...
Coming up next was what I call unexpected. The boat ride heading Sibu Island, the 30 mins was challenging. It was roller coaster all the way as the sea was very choppy. January is the worst Monsoon season they have here and trust me, my pal googled on how to avoid motion sickness before she got on board...many people felt uneasy and wanted to puke...for me...It's just the usual roller coaster feeling that I don't like...the one where you feel your heart drop. Mine dropped numerous times in the boat carrying 50 over of us. But as soon as all these 'storm' were over...what's in front made me forgot all of it...
Total peace and tranquility. I forgotten bout the rough boat ride earlier...meetings over meetings and activities that lined up doesnt seem bad after all...when I'm just here...I felt so free. When I was here looking at this beach and enjoying the seabreeze...I can't help to say, "Thank You"...He's so Almighty yet detailed enough to grant my little wish and make me happy.
On the 2nd nite we were out sitting at this beach looking up...stars filled the whole sky...so much just like the descendants of Abraham....uncountable....someone said, 'Ei why didnt we see this much stars in KL?'...the other answered, 'If you're in KL, usually during this time if you're still outside you would be rushing to get home. How often will you look up there?' haha...true enough. In the midst of our busy-ness in life, how often do we look up?
3 days passed in just a wink of an eye...I left the island with its souvenir of body aches all over...but it was worth every bit of it. And on our way back, we left through Kluang, passing by the familiar childhood house of grandpa's. The familiar Shell station has turned into Caltex...and there was a big signboard which says 'Agape Shelter' at the field. That very field had lots of our laughter and tears, all of me and my cousins through our growing years. That familiar court, was once a place filled with drum rolls and cheers of Lion Dance, as well as our yearly reunion on firecrackers...those were the days...and I'm glad I caught a glimpse of this place again. I'm glad though I'll never get to stay in this place again, it has now been used for His glory, to be a shelter for those who need this place more than myself.
Back to routine in the heart of KL. I enjoyed the weekend a lot, enjoyed that night a lot, where I just looked up the skies and stars and marvelled at His creation. My eyes looked up, so does my heart.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Prioritizing
When it comes to New Year resolutions, people mention about having better time management, self improvement and it all still sums up to how we prioritize life. Everyone has different goals to achieve every year, simply because our convictions and views and priorities in lives are different. What often is the priority of your life? It will then affect choices that we make. We can either list down 100 goals to achieve, and failing all of them if they do not tie back to our priority list, or relook into our priorities, and start PRIORITIZING them...Prioritizing starts with relooking into things in life which are vital, less important and some, totally irrelevant!
But based on whose standard you may ask? Based on whose terms do we know that we are drawing the priorities right? Well, there are no definite answers...but I've learnt to know that Only One set of Word does not contradict itself at any point. It took historians, politicians, researchers, philosophers and many more, to study this myth and still come to a conclusion that yes, only His Word never contradicts at any point between the lines, at all. If you have came across using user guides or instruction manuals to fix things and ended up making it worse, you'll know how important it is to have a set of manual that is reliable and accurate.
Well, of course, this life is MINE, and I can live how I want it to be, according to MY interests, plans and feelings, as well as when I want it to happen, and what do I think is good. Truth is, this all-correct Word has only taught us about the Holy Trinity: Father, Son & Holy Spirit and has said nothing about relying on the unholy trinity: me, myself & I...needless for me to conclude here huh?
Prioritizing, is tightly related with choices. Choose for yourselves, then.
And quoting Joshua "As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord..."
But based on whose standard you may ask? Based on whose terms do we know that we are drawing the priorities right? Well, there are no definite answers...but I've learnt to know that Only One set of Word does not contradict itself at any point. It took historians, politicians, researchers, philosophers and many more, to study this myth and still come to a conclusion that yes, only His Word never contradicts at any point between the lines, at all. If you have came across using user guides or instruction manuals to fix things and ended up making it worse, you'll know how important it is to have a set of manual that is reliable and accurate.
Well, of course, this life is MINE, and I can live how I want it to be, according to MY interests, plans and feelings, as well as when I want it to happen, and what do I think is good. Truth is, this all-correct Word has only taught us about the Holy Trinity: Father, Son & Holy Spirit and has said nothing about relying on the unholy trinity: me, myself & I...needless for me to conclude here huh?
Prioritizing, is tightly related with choices. Choose for yourselves, then.
And quoting Joshua "As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord..."
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Lost in Wonder
A nite where I'm lost of words...the past 24 hours have been like a dream to me...I lost my Little Black yesterday. After almost 3 years, it just disappear...I felt so lost of words and didn't really know how to react. Finally finished all the necessary reports and documents submission for the claim...pray that everything goes well...
There's a saying, a friend in need is a friend indeed. I'm truly blessed by the love and care from my dear friends. Just a phone call means so much to me. I thank God for all the love He has given me. Lost of words, but also lost in the wonder of His love...As I go through the tough times with a single trail of footprints...I know, He is the only One carrying me through...
There's a saying, a friend in need is a friend indeed. I'm truly blessed by the love and care from my dear friends. Just a phone call means so much to me. I thank God for all the love He has given me. Lost of words, but also lost in the wonder of His love...As I go through the tough times with a single trail of footprints...I know, He is the only One carrying me through...
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
小草
大风轻 把头摇一摇
风停了 又挺直腰
大雨来 弯着背 让雨浇
雨停了 抬起头 站直脚
不怕风 不怕雨 立志要长高
小草 实在是并不小
想起我的一位姐妹，突然想到这首儿歌。不知道她弱不禁风的小身体是怎么忍受这些痛楚。。。她真的像棵小草一样勇敢。唯有靠主的喜乐才能捱过去吧！加油！不断在为你祷告。。。人所不能的，他能!
风停了 又挺直腰
大雨来 弯着背 让雨浇
雨停了 抬起头 站直脚
不怕风 不怕雨 立志要长高
小草 实在是并不小
想起我的一位姐妹，突然想到这首儿歌。不知道她弱不禁风的小身体是怎么忍受这些痛楚。。。她真的像棵小草一样勇敢。唯有靠主的喜乐才能捱过去吧！加油！不断在为你祷告。。。人所不能的，他能!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Lingering thoughts...
The usual two hour drive back from home seems passing by so fast today...I can't even complete my set of thinking...or probably it was God's plan that He didnt want me to think too much...I started disliking the wandering thoughts in my mind...somehow I wished they had not exist. Well why wouldn't I? It's there when I wished it wasn't. It's there when I'm supposed to think about other more important things. And whether I like it or not...it's there when it feels like it. Have they asked my permission to linger in my mind?!
Furious...I guess this is one of the nights that I'm just plain angry at myself and I know every single reason why. Somehow I wished all these had not happened and I was just back where I was. I guess I would be happier. But this little voice is ringing in me saying 'I am the One, the Sovereign One'...okay okay...I know...I shouldn't have said that. But You know me, You know what I've gone through. You know how much I wanted to avoid this...You know how hard I tried...(well...maybe not hard enough) but You know that I can't...do this anymore.
I don't want to be like the light and weightless shawl hanging on the hanger...but part of me knew that You wanted me to trust you, and not use my wisdom & strength to work things out the way I wanted. This is a lesson that I have to learn again and again. The fact that this is bothering me so much...tells me off that I'm having such little faith! How could I doubt...after all the faithful journeys we had...how could I?
Quietly my prayer goes to You and I know You hear them. It doesn't matter how it goes...what matters is along the way You are walking with me and I shall not fear nor rush Your timing.
The smell of fresh air after a shower of rain, and the dimming night lights are my faithful companion at this hour. Amazed, I can watch them all night long and just let my eyes linger on the wide sky and moving cars...I love the sky just like that...still, wide & peaceful...just like Your assuring love for me.
Furious...I guess this is one of the nights that I'm just plain angry at myself and I know every single reason why. Somehow I wished all these had not happened and I was just back where I was. I guess I would be happier. But this little voice is ringing in me saying 'I am the One, the Sovereign One'...okay okay...I know...I shouldn't have said that. But You know me, You know what I've gone through. You know how much I wanted to avoid this...You know how hard I tried...(well...maybe not hard enough) but You know that I can't...do this anymore.
I don't want to be like the light and weightless shawl hanging on the hanger...but part of me knew that You wanted me to trust you, and not use my wisdom & strength to work things out the way I wanted. This is a lesson that I have to learn again and again. The fact that this is bothering me so much...tells me off that I'm having such little faith! How could I doubt...after all the faithful journeys we had...how could I?
Quietly my prayer goes to You and I know You hear them. It doesn't matter how it goes...what matters is along the way You are walking with me and I shall not fear nor rush Your timing.
The smell of fresh air after a shower of rain, and the dimming night lights are my faithful companion at this hour. Amazed, I can watch them all night long and just let my eyes linger on the wide sky and moving cars...I love the sky just like that...still, wide & peaceful...just like Your assuring love for me.
Friday, January 1, 2010
01.01.10
Just read a post by A about the coincidences of the number 2...just realized my day was filled with lots of 1!
Such a relaxing way to start the 1st day of the year...woke up at 11, had my fav hometown 1-ton-mee, watch some videos, lazying around, getting ready to go shopping! Ahh...how can life be better than this? I love coming home... :)
I'm carefully planning my goals for the year. Thinking whether I should post 'em up here...still some touch up to do so that my goals are more specific, measurable & executable. Or should I just keep as a little secret with the Almighty?
Currently catching up on my long lost book - Finding Favour with the King by Tommy Tenney. I don't really fancy the name Esther...well I don't really hate it but i won't be naming my baby that...but this particular Esther is a woman that I look up to. More for me to learn.
Blessed New Year everyone!
Such a relaxing way to start the 1st day of the year...woke up at 11, had my fav hometown 1-ton-mee, watch some videos, lazying around, getting ready to go shopping! Ahh...how can life be better than this? I love coming home... :)
I'm carefully planning my goals for the year. Thinking whether I should post 'em up here...still some touch up to do so that my goals are more specific, measurable & executable. Or should I just keep as a little secret with the Almighty?
Currently catching up on my long lost book - Finding Favour with the King by Tommy Tenney. I don't really fancy the name Esther...well I don't really hate it but i won't be naming my baby that...but this particular Esther is a woman that I look up to. More for me to learn.
Blessed New Year everyone!
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